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A MAN SHUT UP TO GOD

Nothing before, nothing behind:
The steps of faith
Fall on the seeming void, and find
The rock beneath.
J. G. WHITTIER.
SUMMER had come again, and the streets were hot and dusty in East
London. Seeing that Mr. Taylor was not looking well, an old friend invited
him down to the coast to spend a few days at Brighton. Mrs. Taylor, who
was concerned about his health, was glad to see him go, though she
understood only in part the experiences through which he was passing.
Even to her, he could not fully show the exercise of soul that was
becoming unbearable.
So it was alone on the sands at Brighton that Sunday morning, that he met
the crisis of his life. He had gone to church with others, but the sight of
multitudes rejoicing in the blessings of salvation was more than he could
bear. “Other sheep I have” — the lost and perishing in China, for whose
souls no man cared — “them also I must bring.” And the tones of the
Master’s voice, the love in the Master’s face pleaded silently.
He knew that God was speaking. He knew, as we have seen, that if he
yielded to His will, and prayed under His guidance, evangelists for inland
China would be given. As to their support, he had no anxiety. He who
called and sent them would not fail to give them daily bread. But what if
they should fail? For Hudson Taylor was facing no unknown situation. He
was familiar with conditions in China, the real temptations to be met, the
real enemy entrenched on his own ground. What if fellow-workers were
overborne and laid the blame on him?
It was just a bringing in of self through unbelief; the devil getting one to
feel (he recalled) that while prayer and faith would bring one into the fix,
one would have to get out of it as best one might. And I did not see that
the power that would give the men and the means would be sufficient to
keep them also, even in the far interior of China.
Meanwhile, a million a month were dying in that great, waiting land —
dying without God. This was burned into his soul. A decision had to be
made and he knew it, for the conflict could no longer be endured. It was
comparatively easy to pray for workers, but would he, could he accept the
burden of leadership?
In great spiritual agony, I wandered out on the sands alone. And there the
Lord conquered my unbelief, and I surrendered myself to God for this
service. I told Him that all the responsibility as to the issues and
consequences must rest with Him; that as His servant it was mine to obey
and to follow Him, His to direct, care for and guide me and those who
might labor with me. Need I say that at once peace flowed into my
burdened heart?
Then and there I asked Him for twenty-four fellow-workers, two for each
of the eleven provinces which were without a missionary and two for
Mongolia; and writing the petition on the margin of the Bible I had with
me, I turned homeward with a heart enjoying rest such as it had been a
stranger to for months, and with an assurance that the Lord would bless
His own work and that I should share in the blessing....
The conflict ended, all was peace and joy. I felt as if I could fly up the hill
to Mr. Pearce’s house. And how I did sleep that night! My dear wife
thought that Brighton had done wonders for me, and so it had.